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Archive for July 2008

When A Man in Love

When a man in love, he begins to care about another as much as himself. He is suddenly released from the binding chains of being motivated for himself alone and becomes free to give to another, not for personal gain, but out of caring. He experiences his partner’s fulfillment.

As if it were his own. He can easily endure any hardship to make her happy because her happiness make him happy. His struggles become easier. He is energized with a higher purpose.

In his youth he can be satisfied by serving himself alone, but as he matures self-gratification is no longer as satisfying. . To experience fulfillment he must begin to life motivated by love.

Being inspired to give in such a free and selfless way liberates him from the inertia of self-gratification devoid of caring for other. Although he still needs to receive love, his greatest need is to give love.

Most men are not only hungry to give love but are starving for it. Their biggest problem is that they do not know what they are missing. They rarely saw their fathers succeed in fulfilling their mothers through giving.

As a result they do not know that a major source of fulfillment for a man can come through giving. When his relationships fail he finds himself depressed and stuck in his cave. He stops caring and doesn’t know why he is so depressed.

At such times he withdraws from relationships or intimacy and remains stuck in his cave. He asks himself what it is all for, and why he should bother. He doesn’t know that he has stopped caring because he doesn’t feel needed. He does not realize that by finding someone who needs him, he can shake off his depression and he be motivated again.

When a man doesn’t feel he is making a positive difference in someone else’s life, it is hard for him to continue caring about his life and relationships. It is difficult to be motivated again he needs to feel appreciated, trusted and accepted.

Not to be needed is a slow death for a man.

Extracted from Man are from Mars, Women are from Venus

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